There tends to exist between the gay and straight communities a general lack of communication. And this lack of communication has created a stale mate. But worse, it has created a wall so thick between them that they no longer even speak the same language. It is very important, if there is to be any resolution, that both sides understand each other.

Sexual identity (often called "Sexual Orientation") and Sexual promiscuity are two different things, but unfortunately when a homosexual says "I'm gay", the Christian typically hears "I'm whoring around with the same gender", and then the morality battle begins because it is wrongfully presumed that "same-gender fornication" is the definition of homosexuality. To save everyone this trap while reading this site, here is a brief list of proper definitions of words. Please review the following words – and remember them - so that we are all speaking the same language as we venture through this site.

SEXUAL PREFERENCE: Actually, there is no such thing. The proper term is Sexual Identity, or sexual orientation. A preference assumes that a person likes two different things but prefers one over the other. For example, I like corn and asparagus; but if given the choice I prefer corn over asparagus. This is a preference. However, I like white cake and have virtually no interest in chocolate cake; therefore I do not prefer white over chocolate because I never liked chocolate in the first place - chocolate isn't even a choice for me and therefore I cannot prefer it more or less than white.

THEREFORE:

 - a heterosexual does not “prefer” the opposite gender over the same gender, because the heterosexual had virtually no interest in the same gender in the first place and therefore does not have the option to prefer one more or less than the other

 - a homosexual does not “prefer” the same gender over the opposite gender, because the homosexual has virtually no interest in the opposite gender in the first place and therefore does not have the option to prefer one more or less than the other.

HETEROSEXUAL ("straight"): a male or female who innately is mentally, emotionally, physically, genetically and sexually attracted, and feels internally connected, only to other human members of the opposite gender, and who can enter into a romantic and sexual relationship or union only with members of the opposite gender, regardless of condition of virginity.

HOMOSEXUAL ("gay/lesbian"): a male or female who innately is mentally, emotionally, physically, genetically and sexually attracted, and feels internally connected, only to other human members of the same gender, and who can enter into a romantic and sexual relationship or union only with members of the same gender, regardless of condition of virginity.

EX-GAY: There are two different types of ex-gays:

EX-EX-GAY: a homosexual who has recovered from subjection to brainwashing techniques that had convinced the person that he or she had become heterosexual.

BISEXUAL ("bi"): A heterosexual man or woman who encounters lustful desires for the same gender, or a homosexual man or woman who encounters lustful desires for the opposite gender. The Kinsey Institute claims that most human beings encounter these sensations but do not act upon the; those who do act upon them categorize their fornication as "bisexuality". Often a homosexual person who has repressed their true sexuality by trying to live a fraudulent heterosexual life will label themselves bisexual simply because they have had sex with the opposite gender and/or have gotten used to it. There are a great many reasons why heterosexuals have sex with the same gender, and they incorrectly label themselves bisexual. Having intercourse with both genders does not constitute a bi-sexual identity but a violation of the person's hetero or homo sexual identity, much like a right handed person trying to use his left hand. A "true" bisexual (if there really is such a thing... and in my experience only hermaphrodites qualify) is a person  - while yet in their virginity - who is able to enter a romantic lifetime union (marriage) with any person without any regard whatsoever to the gender of the other person, and would not favor one gender over the other in any way – and, most importantly, would not need both genders to be satisfied. This is biblically demonstrated in other chapters here.

BI CURIOUS: not to be confused with a true homosexual or heterosexual, or even a "bi-sexual", a Bi Curious person is one who feels multiple internal signals from both genders and is not sure to which sexual category he or she belongs, though generally such a person will lean toward homosexuality. There are countless psychological reasons for this condition, some benign and some serious. This condition is typically found in young people due to the constant mixed messages constantly barraging them from all directions of Society and social media; generally with time and guidance from the Lord, their true identity will become aware to them.

TRANS SEXUAL: a heterosexual or homosexual male or female who has had, or wishes to have, genital reassignment through surgery to that of the opposite gender as a result of identity loss and a sense of low self-worth due to lack of gender edification. In ultra-rare cases, the cause is genetic malfunction in the womb, similar to that found with hermaphrodites who are born with both gender's genitals.

TRANSVESTITE: a heterosexual or homosexual male or female who finds pleasure in, or who prefers to wear, clothing and paraphernalia commonly associated with the opposite gender. The term "Drag Queen" generally refers to homosexual transvestites. The term "Female Impersonator" generally refers to anyone who dresses as the opposite gender for entertainment purposes, regardless of whether that person is a transvestite.

HOMOPHOBIA: a psychological disorder causing fear of same-gender intimacy, or of others of the same gender who are intimate, who hates and/or represses others who are not like them, either by threats, violence, or the passage of discriminatory laws.

PEDOPHILIA: a psychological dysfunction causing a heterosexual or homosexual to be sexually gratified with prepubescent children, sometimes borne out of lust but more often the result of having been sexually molested at a young age.

BEASTIALITY: a psychological dysfunction causing a heterosexual or homosexual to engage in sexual contact with species outside of the Image of God (mankind).

Consider, please, this article from the esteemed Cleveland Clinic. Reviewed by the doctors at The Cleveland Clinic Department of Psychiatry and Psychology. Edited by Charlotte E. Grayson, MD

© 2003 The Cleveland Clinic [All Rights Reserved]:

“Sexuality is an important part of who we are as humans. Beyond the ability to reproduce, sexuality also defines how we see ourselves and how we physically relate to others. "Sexual orientation" is a term used to refer to a person's emotional, romantic, and sexual attraction to individuals of a particular gender (male or female). Sexual orientation generally is divided into 3 categories:

Heterosexual: attracted to individuals of the opposite sex

Bisexual: attracted to members of either sex

Homosexual: attracted to individuals of one's own sex

“Sexual orientation involves a person's feelings and sense of identity; it may or may not be evident in the person's appearance or behavior. People may have attractions to people of the same or opposite sex but may elect not to act on these feelings. For example, a bisexual may choose to have a monogamous (one partner) relationship with one gender and, therefore, elect not to act on the attraction to the other gender.

“Why Are Some People Homosexual or Bisexual? Most scientists today agree that sexual orientation is the result of a combination of environmental, emotional, hormonal, and biological factors. In other words, there are many factors that contribute to a person's sexual orientation, and the factors may be different for different people. However, homosexuality and bisexuality are not caused by the way a child was reared by his or her parents, or by having a sexual experience with someone of the same sex when the person was young. Also, being homosexual or bisexual does not mean the person is mentally ill or abnormal in some way, although there may be social problems that result from prejudicial attitudes or misinformation.

“How Does a Person Know Their Sexual Orientation? For many people, their sexual orientation becomes evident to them during adolescence or young adulthood, and in many cases without any sexual experience. For example, homosexuals become aware that their sexual thoughts and activities focus on people of the same sex. It is possible, however, to have fantasies or to be curious about people of the same sex without being homosexual or bisexual, or choosing to act on these impulses/attractions.

“Can a Person's Sexual Orientation Be Changed? Most experts agree that sexual orientation is not a choice and, therefore, cannot be changed. Some people who are homosexual or bisexual may hide their sexual orientation and/or live as heterosexuals to avoid the prejudice that exists against people who are homosexual and bisexual or to avoid their own moral dilemmas felt when their sexual orientation is incompatible with their personal beliefs.

“Are There Support Groups Available for People Struggling With Their Sexuality? Yes. There are a number of different support systems available to those in need. These support systems can help them develop strategies for dealing with the prejudice associated with homosexuality and the damaging effects of bias and stereotypes.”

[Rev. James Cunningham and Gay Christian Survivors are not affiliated

in any way with the Cleveland Clinic]